Cry Baby

Lately I have realized that I have turned into a sissy. A regular old cry baby. I know as a child I used to cry a lot. There are plenty of pictures, home movies, etc. to prove it. I blame my older brother, Brent, for most of those events. He would tell me I was adopted right before the camera clicked, or run by and punch me before my dad panned the camcorder my way. When he died though, I remember thinking "I have to be strong for my mom and dad. I can't cry." And I didn't. I didn't cry at the funeral, burial or any other time in front of my parents if it had to do with Brent or his death. Anytime my mom or dad would cry, I would stand steadfast without a single tear. When my mom would go into the hospital I would do the same thing. Hold in any tears and force myself not to cry. When my dad would tell me her cancer was back, I wouldn't cry, at least not in front of him or my mom. I didn't even cry at her funeral.

So why now do I cry at commercials? Movies? American Idol? Anything that breathes? Seriously, it doesn't take much to get a mushy tear out of me. If something touches my heart, I cry. I can't even sing the song "How Deep the Father's Love For Us" without crying. Every time that song makes me cry. It is a beautiful song though! And if someone around me is crying, I cry. I like to think my new motto is "no one cries alone." I got teary eyed last night watching a video of my nephew Zane counting to 10 in Spanish. It really doesn't take much.

Maybe I'm making up for lost time. All those years I spent holding in the tears, I'm now letting them out, and look out because the flood gates are open! I don't know why I can cry at the drop of a hat now, but I think I'm going to blame the movie My Dog Skip for the conception of the tearful Melody. Adriane and I watched that movie our sophomore year on my bed in my dorm room. What started out as a lovable movie about a boy and his dog quickly turned into a sad, sad movie when after the dog saved the boy's life, Skip dies alone on the boy's bed after the boy left for college. Adriane and I were sobbing about poor, poor Skip the Dog who just died alone. So there you have it. Skip the Dog can turn a strong-willed, stonewall girl into a blubbering mess. Don't watch it unless you enjoy a good sob fest.